How to Make America Great Again

Donald Trump should, scratch that, needs to invite Richard Spencer to the white house. The media and public would collectively shit their pants. Just when their cries of despair reach a fever pitch a livefeed of the white house would appear on every channel throughout the country. An Image of Richie sitting in the Oval office waiting eagerly to meet with his new BFF appears. He is smiling from ear to ear as he painstakingly greases up his dapper haircut. Suddenly the star spangled banner starts blaring at full volume. The room begins to shake. The lights and windows in the office explode from such intensity. Richard is confused, but excited. “Fuer Trump must be really giddy to meet me” he tells himself. Out of nowhere The Donald bursts through the floorboards. He’s completely nude, except for the American flag he’s donning as a cape and a majestic portrait of an eagle in flight tattooed on his chest. Richard begins to quiver as his brain doesn’t quite know how to process such a beautiful image. The Donald, now fully erect, says “this is what we do to nazis in trump’s America” as he grabs a pair of red, white, and blue brass knuckles off of his desk. Spencer’s excitement has now turned to fear. “I thought you were hear to embrace me, daddy?” he whimpers meekly. The Donald stares piercingly into his soul. Richard empties his bowels. The Donald, now disgusted, draws back his mighty fist. “This” he screams “is how you make America great again!” as he throws the hardest altright hook this country has ever seen. The feed cuts in and out due to the sheer magnitude of such a colossal punch. When the dust settles and the camera steadies Richard is nowhere to b found, with only a glob of greasy hair remaining. The next day the Donald’s approval rating soars to a record 81818%. 

(exclaimer: IDK shit about politics,)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s